When tragedy strikes, and one is faced with the loss of a loved one, a debilitating injury, or the lifelong care of another human being, people seem to comment, "there's a reason for everything." Along with that, "good always comes from it" or "you have something really important left to do."
What do you believe? Each person involved with a life changing episode, or a tragic set of circumstances, will choose a reason that fits their philosophy. Did this happen to me / him / her because:
o There is a lesson to be learned?
o Something has been left undone?
o It is karma for a past deed?
o It was the wrong place, right / wrong time?
o It was an act of God?
o Life stinks and then you die?
I really can't answer any of these questions. You have to figure it out for yourself.
I believe there are different reasons for specific situations. Anyone who tells me that a perfectly healthy child dies because it's "God's will" is likely to get a negative reaction of some sort from me. On the other hand, there are situations where people are better off dead. I mean, horrible things do happen … wars, illness, or accidents. I don't believe that people left in a state where they are absolutely helpless should live. I don't think they would want to, but that's my opinion.
There was a recent article about a man from Belgium, who was in a "coma" for 23 years. He was awake and could hear everything, but could not react to anything. His mind was, "locked in." He is now communicating with his family through the aid of a device for communication. So now, my opinion about letting people die has just gone out the window. Would they want to die under certain sets of circumstances, or would they want to fight for their recovery? This is a question you should ask your loved ones before something ever happens.
At a conference this year, I listened to a mother's story about her son's fight for life after contracting spinal meningitis. The doctors said he would be blind, deaf, and / or a vegetable after the disease ravaged his little body. Then, they asked if she wanted to continue his treatment. She did, and her son, although he is now deaf, continued his life to become a successful internet guru and a motivational speaker.
At one point, after my husband's accident, it was thought he would be paralyzed from the neck down. Thankfully, it didn't come to that, but I know he would not want to live under those circumstances; no legs, unable to move or care for himself. He would have needed total care; lifting, feeding, diapering, bathing, everything. His dignity would have been been gone, and dignity is something he could not have lived without.
After a near death experience, people who "come back" often say they were spared from death to fulfill or finish something. Most say they are not told what that reason is, but whatever the task, known or unknown, they have to go back and finish. In Gary's case, he was given a choice to stay or go back. He does not know the reason, but he has made one up that fulfills him:
"I have my reason; to make a different in the world before I leave it for good. I am not afraid to die because I have seen and know what comes after. In fact, I was given a choice. I begged to come back to life. I view my situation as an opportunity: An opportunity to offer help and support to those in need, especially children. "
"There are so many whose quality of life can be made better by my efforts, and I intend to do what I can to help. No matter what reason one chooses to believe, my suggestion to everyone before they leave this life would be to ask themselves this question, "What can I do to make someone's life better? "
To answer the question, "Does everything happen for a reason? My answer," I don't know. "Gary's answer," I would like to think so. "What's your answer?